Lessons Learned

Zodiac tattoos are never a good idea.

Drive. Then drink. Then don’t drive. But bring road soda. I really mean a soda. No, really. A soda.

No one will buy the cow if you’re passing the milk out for free. Even if that cow is super cute, educated, funny, and a “strong and independent” woman.

Dressing up as a Playboy bunny for Halloween, when you’re 8, may be frowned upon.

Pedicure beads will give you a yeast infection if you use them as bath beads.

No amount of Intervention or Hoarders reruns will satiate my need for A&E.

Summerlandish

Adjective

  1. She gives the most summerlandish excuses: weird, queer, far out, quirky, zany, eccentric, idiosyncratic, unconventional, unorthodox, funny, bizarre, unusual, singular, extraordinary, strange, unfamiliar, peculiar, odd, curious, informal, offbeat, off the wall, way-out, wacky, freaky, kooky, kinky, oddball, in left field
  2. Antonyms: ordinary.